Posted by: Thomas Drinkard | May 5, 2012

Learning More Than I Wanted to Know – 8th Post in the Rehab Journal

There are certain things one doesn’t want to know. For example, how the silk inside a coffin smells.   Others include; the skill of using a walker to get to and use the the pottie and the rhythms and schedules of a hospital, nursing home, or rehabilitation facility. Learning those well means a much more intimate acquaintance than anyone—other than medical, therapy and administrative professionals—would wish.

This morning, for example, two nurses’ aides came in at two and four a.m. with the mini  crane for my roommate’s procedures.  They banged around and chatted amiably. Each time, when they were about to leave, one  peered around the curtain that divides the room.

“You need anything Hon?”

There were several tempting replies, but I just said, “No. Thank you.”

At about 5:15 AM, the ice wagon stopped in front of the door.

“Would you like some ice?”

The question was strident and impossibly cheery.

With no answer, she came in and filled the plastic pitcher with ice, sat it carefully on a table I couldn’t possibly reach.

“You sleep well, now,” she said.

I asked her to close the door as she left. Strangely enough, I went back to sleep (thanks to the painkillers).

A tiny tapping, like a baby woodpecker trying its beak, brought me back from the land of Nod.

“Laundry,” she said.

“My laundry’s being done at home,” I said—for maybe the fifth time.

She’s never picked up any of my clothes.  Maybe she thought I’d changed my mind. She rooted around the closet for a bit, apparently picking up my roommate’s laundry. As she was closing the door, she paused and peeked through a tiny slit.

“Thank you,” she said.

In what seemed like 15 minutes, the nurse came in to give me my morning meds. When she switched on the light,  the clock on the wall showed 6:10.

Breakfast: Scrambled eggs, bacon and a biscuit. Not bad. There was also  a small bowl of oatmeal, as usual. I tasted the stuff and discovered it was like all the other samples I’d tried. Yuk.
The Lorcet was beginning to kick in, though.  I was lucky  I didn’t  fall asleep nose first, into the eggs.

As Kurt Vonnegut’s character said, “And so it goes…”

Did I get a good night’s sleep? Yes, sort of… I started at about 9:30 last night.

I’d heard others complain about all the above, but learning them first hand is more deep knowledge than I wanted.

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